Vampires, Zombies, and Pancakes
by Queenscove's Girl
Summary: Dom dies, Thom brings him back. Sabine is a Hoe, and Owen is very flammable. Crackfic! Written during the aftermath of Smackdown.


Title: Zombies, Vampire, and Pancakes

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Use of the word "Hoe".

Summary: Dom dies, Thom brings him back. Sabine is a Hoe, and Owen is very flammable. Crackfic!

AN: This fic is inspired by the chat, So i dedicate it to; Sam-and-antha, Rowena, Emberrose, Darkane, Wordy, Greenie, Katty, Jazzyjess, Bec, and anyone else that was there for our crazy chat session

**Zombies, Vampires, and Pancakes**

Kel stared in abject horror as she looked at Dom's mangled body. He had been fighting Owen and had impaled himself with his own sword. Her eyes started watering as she wondered how he could possibly be so stupid as to run himself through with his own sword.

"Ah, no need to cry my dear. I am here to bring young Dom back."

"Thom, Alanna's brother? But your dead!"

"Not anymore, since as you can see I am now a Zombie."

"Oh, I didn't realize. But why are you here? Can you really bring Dom back?"

"Certainly, why just look I have brought my lover Roger back with me as well! So Dom shouldn't be any trouble for one with my skills."

"You brought Roger back? But he tried to destroy the entire kingdom!"

"I did not! I merely tried to take over, get your facts straight."

"Oh, well in that case I'm terribly sorry. Are you a Zombie now as well?"

"Yes he is." Said Thom. "Now if you'll just be quiet for a moment I will bring Dom back now."

He started to mutter incomprehensible words and wave his arms around dramatically. Colors of light filled the air when suddenly more voices could be heard, chanting.

"Oh no! It's the fan girls! If these ones continue chanting for Owen then I won't be able to bring Dom back!"

"That's dreadful! Are there anymore fan girls out there? Please chant for Dom!" Kel begged.

The whispers grew louder, Owen, Owen, Owen.

Then more voices joined in, but these ones were chanting Dom, Dom, Dom.

This seemed enough to balance each other out because soon Dom sat up, looking almost as good as new. Kel noticed that he was decidedly pale, and his teeth were much pointier.

"Oh Dom! I am so happy you're alive again!"

"Me too, now we can finally be together!"

"Well actually, he's not quite alive."

"What?" They both asked.

"Yes, unlike Roger and me he is not a Zombie but he is a Vampire. And not the sparkly kind either! He's a real Tortallian Vampire."

"Yes." Roger added. "And I'm also afraid he cannot be with you Keladry. You see, we want him for ourselves. A Masbolle Sandwich!"

"Don't worry sweetheart, you can be with me!" Kel looked up to see a woman she had never met before.

"Who are you?"

"My name is Sabine, and I love you so you can forget about this Dom fellow and be with me."

"Alright!"

"SABINE, YOU HOE!" Cried Vania as she raced towards them "How dare you take Kel away from me!"

"I did nothing of the sort! She wants me not you Vania!"

"No she wants me!" Cried Vania.

"No she wants me!" Interjected Dom

"She can't have you because you're ours!" Thom and Roger said. "But perhaps she can join us..."

"No way Thom! Kel is mine!" Said Alanna angrily as she appeared on the scene.

"Stop! You can share me!" Kel said happily.

Vania blinked. "You know what? I take that back Sabine, You're not the Hoe, Kel is! She just wants to be with everyone!"

The others started nodding when Owen walked up to see what all the commotion was about.

"Dom your alive? NOOOOOO! I won this round! You're not allowed to liiiiiive!"

"I'm not alive, I'm a Vampire!" Said Dom as he rushed Owen. They started fighting, and eventually the others all joined in to help Dom.

They eventually had Owen Pinned down and Alanna asked, "I wonder if he is flammable?"

"He is probably very flammable, let's try it!" Dom said happily. So they lit Owen on fire and he died a jolly death.

"Well now that is settled lets all go eat some pancakes!"

"Yum! With blood instead of syrup!" Dom licked his lips as he said it. So they all walked away cheerfully, Thom, Dom, and Rodger in their Masbolle sandwich, Sabine and Vania holding hands, and Alanna with George who had magically appeared.

"Oh no, I am all alone now!"

"No you're not; you'll never be alone so long as I am here!" Said Raoul sweetly as he walked up from behind her.

"Oh Raoul! I love you! But what about Buri?"

"We don't need to worry about her, Alanna drowned her."

"Oh lovely!" So Kel and Raoul embraced and then ran to catch up with the others, eager to have some pancakes. 


End file.
